In Memory of September 11th

It was one of those magnificent early autumn mornings, sunny, cool and breezy. Having returned from a long delightful walk with my aging dog Pip on the Freedom Path near the Carter Presidential Center, I flipped on the radio in the kitchen, the radio set to NPR.

The commentators were discussing the impact of an airplane into a building; I was only somewhat paying attention thinking they were discussing the FX of some new movie. Gradually realizing something wasn't right, I went into the next room and turned on my television.

Shock! Dismay! Disbelief! My mind could not grasp the horror. I stood transfixed in front of the TV watching, listening. A plane had flown into one of the Towers? What? How? Who? Why? Oh my God all the people in the building, on the plane... Then, along with everyone else watching TV, I heard the sound of an airplane. The camera caught the motion of the plane swooping in low over the city as it unbelievably flew into the second Tower, exploding into flames. Oh my God! This can't be real!! What about all the people??

I am crying as I write this.

My mind did not want to believe what it had just seen. How could this be real? What about all the people, oh my God! Who could be so insane as to do this?

I called my daughters, told them what was going on, to turn on the TV, to stay home and be safe. I wanted to talk to my Dad, he could always help to make sense of the world but he had passed away in December. I was so upset that my daughters and my baby granddaughter were in two different cities and I could not have them with me. Was it safe to drive, should I go get them? Fear! Panic!

The news of the plane crashing into the Pentagon. The news of the plane crashing in Pennsylvania. Oh my God. Oh my God. Are all these people dead? Who could do something so evil??

The time line is somewhat jumbled in my mind. I know I could not move away from the TV, so I was watching 'live' as people were jumping out of the Towers, oh! God Bless those poor souls, so horrific! And watching as each of the Towers collapsed. More disbelief! Horror! How could those buildings just collapse like that, were there bombs at the base? Oh my God all the people dying!!

At the time I was living on the outskirts of Atlanta and was terrified that planes would soon begin crashing into the tall buildings downtown. Would we all be reduced to rubble during this day?

The hours and days are a blur. I don't remember eating, don't remember going anywhere. I remember watching news coverage, watching Oprah. And for days and days watching the funerals on TV, hearing the bagpipes play 'Amazing Grace' again and again; the overwhelming sadness of all the people who had died!!

I also vividly remember how QUIET the world was for days after, there were no planes flying, it wasn't allowed. The quiet was eerie, uncomfortable and alien.

Then one day Oprah said something like: we all need to stop being fearful, pull away from the TV and resume living our lives. It really was great advice. It seemed as if I had been holding my breath for hours, days, waiting for the world to blow up, explode. I had been given 'permission' to live again. I exhaled.

The Sandy Springs Art Festival was to be on September 17th, 2001, and I was a jewelry artist vendor for the event. The committee decided not to cancel the event, to go ahead with the festival, to make it as patriotic as possible, and was it ever! The Annual Animal Parade was marvelous, owners and their pets decked out in Red/White/Blue most likely outdoing any 4th of July show! And the citizens of Sandy Springs turned out in droves to support the festival, to support America!

During the afternoon of the festival, we all heard the sound of an airplane. What? How? No airplanes!! It was as if everyone had taken in one collective breath and holding it in anticipation of... Artists, vendors came out of their tents, shoppers, even children all looked up at the plane that was flying low and slow heading right over our location. We all watched as a military plane went overhead and kept on going, low and slow. And then one collective exhale, a sigh of relief, as we all realized the plane was staying airborne, we were safe, the festivities resumed.

Ten Years Later. Is there anyone else like myself who has not recovered from this, just from viewing the events live on TV? I still cry just seeing photographs of this day. All the lives lost! The horror of the events! Senseless madness!

How can we say we are 'civilized' when we continue to participate in wars, when terrorism thrives around the globe?

I am sending peaceful, healing energy into the world in Memory of September 11th. Please join me.

Love & Peace ~Gilannie~